Surviving The Shift

Being in transition is hard. And it’s not hard because it’s new. It’s hard because 1, we can’t see what’s going to happen and 2, we’re not in full and total control. I love to be in control. I have to know everything. I need to know when, where, why, how, who, and everything else. In all honesty, this bad habit is the reason why God often times places me in situations that I have no power over. The only power I have is power over me.

Right now, I’m up against 5 major mountains and when I tell you I have absolutely no power over them, I mean NONE! The only thing I have power over is me. I can only control what I do, what I say, and how I act in response to the obstacles in front of me. I’ve deemed these situations God situations. God situations are the situations where all you have to make it through is prayer, fasting, and faith. That’s it.

When utilizing these 3 keys to get through, you begin to turn the mirror on yourself. You start to see the things that you would hate to see in other people. You start to see your bad habits, your toxic traits, and your shortcomings. You even start to see the bad choices that you hid from yourself just so you wouldn’t have to deal with them. In this season, I’ve started to see all of that. It hurt in the beginning, but then I realized how can I possibly be a light when I’m still living in the dark? So. I found my voice. I started saying things out loud. I started to be transparent with God. I started to be honest about the things that hurt so bad I ended up feeling nothing at all.

I didn’t really know that this period would come with all of this, but I’m honestly glad it did. I’ve learned how to extend grace. I’ve learned how to speak up and not whisper when it comes to expressing myself. I’ve even learned to continuously pray for myself while still praying for others. Now, I’m not all the way there yet. I still struggle with self-control, forgiveness, forgetting, and other things, but I started and I’m trying. As long as you start and you’re trying, that’s what’s pleasing in God’s eyes. So with that being said, I’m praying that we all Survive The Shift. Pastor K preached about this a couple of months ago and this message couldn’t have come at a better time. My only desire is that we all become our very best selves through God. The only way we can see God is if we choose to see ourselves the exact way He sees us. The parts that are broken and tainted and we still look at ourselves and say “You’re still worth it.” We have to survive the shift. It hurts. I know. But nothing worth having comes easy.

Talk to me anytime. I’m always here. I love you. I’ll be praying for you.

You were created with a divine purpose that will ultimately lead to your destiny. God bless you.

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From The Inside

I want to be better. And not just better for a moment. I want to be better for forever. I want to constantly change everyday fighting to become the very best version of myself. I’ve done bad things. I’ve said some horrible stuff. I’ve been in some places I had no business being in. BUT God still gives me a chance day after day to be better.

So yeah. I’m gonna fight to be better. Better than what I’ve seen. Better than what I’ve heard. I’m gonna change the trajectory of my bloodline. I’m gonna break the generational curses. I’m gonna be the one to make the devil get nervous at the sound of my feet hitting the floor. I’m gonna make God so proud that He’s she’s at least one year of gladness knowing that his daughter finally got it. That’s the goal. I can’t wait. I’m excited for this. I’m excited for my better.

Push Season

I was watching a sermon from one of Pastor Keion Henderson’s services at The Lighthouse and he said something that literally spoke to my right now. He was speaking about the birth of Jesus and how Mary had to birth him in the space that she did. It was unfit for the birth of a child. It was unsanitary, it was not inside of a building. There were no proper tools being used. There wasn’t even a midwife. BUT even in those circumstances she still gave birth to a King. Fast forward to the point. Pastor K said that sometimes you have to give birth in hard places.

I’m in a hard place. And I am fighting and fighting and fighting and sometimes I feel like I’m losing. I know there is something that I am supposed to give birth to in this season, but it is so very hard to give birth in troubling circumstances. I’m trying to get this gift out. I want to get this gift out, but my surroundings are so very distracting. Instead of remaining focused on the process of the birthing of this thing, I’ve allowed the noise from the outside to interrupt what’s going on in the inside not realizing that I’m prolonging the process.

As people, we have to stop prolonging the process. We often times allow our surroundings to distract us from the task at hand. Mary gave birth to a King in filth. It is not what she expected. It is not what she asked for, BUT it is what God gave her to work with. She accepted her circumstances and said ya know what, I’m gon’ get this baby out of me. No matter the dirt that lies under me or the poverty that surrounds me, I’m going to give birth to the blessing that lies inside of me. I want that mentality for me. No. Scratch that. I want that mentality for us. I want us to have tunnel vision in our hard places. I want us to envision the light at the end of the tunnel even though we can’t physically see it. Let’s work on that. Together. Let’s work on giving birth to that thing we’ve been holding on to. It’s time to share our blessings with the world. We’ve been pregnant long enough. It’s time to get through this labor process. Mary gave birth to a King in her mess. What do you think you could birth to in yours?

I love you all and never forget that you were created with a divine purpose that will ultimately lead to your destiny.

Dear Daughter

Daughter, you’re always so busy. Never doing one thing at a time. You’ve started losing sleep again too. You ask me for my time and then when I don’t come quick enough, you become impatient. Do you not remember every time I came through for you? It may have taken a while, but I worked it out for you. And in that time of waiting, I was right by your side. I never left you. You asked me to fix it with tears falling from your eyes, and as I sit here by your side, you keep forgetting. You keep forgetting to follow me. To follow me through and through. Daughter, I cannot Fix it if you don’t Follow me. So, come here. Take my hand. Walk with me. I’ll never leave you. I know they did, but I promised you I never would. I know that’s what you fear. That’s why you push me away. You’re expectant of me to leave you soon enough. But I won’t. I promise. I love you. Now Follow your Father so I can Fix it.
–God

In The Wait

I wrote this a while ago for a friend. Felt like I should release it again. Hope it keeps you encouraged!

To the girl who watches romantic movies and wishes she had that love, he’s coming. Now, I don’t know when he’s coming and don’t how you two will meet, but I am certain that this event will take place. How do I know? I’m so glad you asked. I know this because no one person was created to spend their life alone.

We all have a mate. We all have our “person“. Biblically, we’re some man’s rib meaning that we were created to be by man’s side. The woman is a key component to the continuation of their lives. They will always need our help. I know it may not seem like it due to society’s definition of what a man is suppose to be, but sooner or later he will realize that he will never be able to make it in this world alone. He will always feel as if he’s missing something until he finds you.

You are a gift. Your King is out there right now looking for everything that you have to offer. When he comes, he will love you beyond your right now and worship every inch of you that you love to neglect. Those random pimples, that annoying midsection, and that one roll on your back that won’t go away no matter what. He will love all of that and more. You will be perfect to him.

God hasn’t forgotten about you. He’s preparing him for you and you for him. Continue to pray for him and that he rests in God. Don’t let go of your hope. Keep watching those movies and keep planning your wedding on Pinterest. Never give up on love. It is the one thing that keeps the world in constant rotation. Never forget that a King is NOTHING without his Queen. Get ready love. He’s on his way!

I love you and never forget that you were created with a divine purpose that will ultimately lead to your destiny.

Shift Appreciation

I would always wonder why bad things happened to good people. I would go “God, she’s such a sweet person. Why would you hurt her like that? Was she not good enough? Did she make you mad? What is it?”. It took a while for me to get an answer, but after much stretching and growing, I finally got one.

Bad things don’t happen to good people because God is upset. In all honesty, those “bad” things aren’t really bad things at all. The enemy may have implemented them for your bad, but God intercedes so that they may work out for your good. The enemy ultimately comes with one goal in mind. TO DESTROY. I know the Bible says he comes to steal and kill too (John 10:10), but those are just introductory points in my opinion. His overall goal is to destroy any and everything that was birthed from God. His overall goal is to destroy you.

That sounds horrible, I know, but let me tell you how that could NEVER come to pass. God is the orchestrator and ruler of all things. He created this earth. Might of fact, He created the devil as well. Of course he wasn’t the devil when he was created, but in the end that’s what he turned out to be. There is NOTHING the enemy can do without permission from God. He cannot pass go. He cannot collect a hundred dollars. The enemy can only do what God allows and if God allows it please believe that every intent of the enemy is cast out and replaced with the blueprint of God.

Whatever hellish situation you’ve gone through, you’re going through, or going to go through is not bad. The intent of it was bad. And true enough the birthing of it was meant for the destruction of you, but God. He didn’t, He doesn’t, and He will never see fit. He only comes so that you may have life and have it more abundantly (John 10:10). God is not upset with you. He is not angry with you. He does not do anything with the intent of harming you. He only operates with one thing in mind. The fulfillment of your purpose. The bettering of you. So remain encouraged. You’re suppose to be here. You will not lose. You will not be defeated.

This storm is not your Superior. It is your Strengthener.

I love you so very much and never forget that you were created with a divine purpose that will ultimately lead to your destiny.

I’m Single, Not Sickly

 

I’m so tired of people treating us single folk as if we have some sort of disease. We are not on the sick and shut in list. We do not need a provider. Have you ever thought that we’re single because we’re focusing on us? Trying to better ourselves as a whole so that when that time comes for us to embark upon the chapter that will include our mate, we won’t chase them away.

We are not picky. We just know what we were promised. Why would we settle for mess and end up miserable trying to make two uneven ends meet? We’re taking this time to grow. To get better. To become who we’re suppose to be in God. We do not need the companionship of someone else to offer us joy. We do not need a relationship to offer us an identity or a form of validation. We are the sons and daughters of a King. Thats enough validation to carry us through.

After being told that you’ve been single for so long and your time is running out, one can become discouraged. I know this. I hear it. I’m here to stand with you and remind you that IT IS BETTER TO WAIT LONG THAN TO MARRY WRONG. Do not get tricked into settling. Keep growing and keep fighting for your better. You’re choosing to let God have His way in your life and shape and mold you into what a wife/husband should be in His eyes. Let Him have his way. I promise its okay.

The next time someone asks you when you’re going to settle down and have some kids, tell them when my father decides to give me away.

Compensational Care

I’m so very sorry if my new found care for me comes off as a lack of care for you. Well, I’m not really sorry, I just felt as if it was the polite thing to say when you offend someone AKA hurt their feelings. I’m honestly not sorry for caring about me for once. All of my life I’ve been a people pleaser. I’ve gone broke attending birthday dinners and social functions. I’ve lost sleep being a listening ear. And lets not forget to mention my plans that I rearranged to accommodate you.

All of that extra work is over now. See, this is what I figured. Somebody has to put SaTara first and who better to do it than SaTara? Clearly you didn’t want the job, so I will take up all compensation connected to this captivating career. Now look now, when the fruits of my labor start to roll in, please oh please do not have your hand stretched, stuck, or stemmed out towards my direction. I cannot help you. Why? Because when I tried to partner up with you for the provision of the promise, you threw me away.

You thought you threw me to the wolves, but you actually threw me in the direction of my Father. He has much training in protecting his children from the things that are meant to tear them apart.

Breaking Up With The Enemy

I would always walk on eggshells around you. I always wanted to make you happy. Make sure you were comfortable. No matter how uncomfortable and unhappy I was, I considered you. I considered you in everything I did. I overlooked every time you threw me away and all the times you abandoned me. You left me to fend for myself countless times without a single clue on how to survive. I had to figure it out. There were moments where I didn’t know my left from my right and all I desired was for you to care. I just wanted a little mercy from you. A little consideration. A simple “It’ll be okay.” I couldn’t even get that. I NEVER got that from you.

I thought you loved me. You never told me, I just thought you did. Why? Because you took the time out to sit with me. To be around me and in my presence. I thought that was love. I thought that was you caring. But it wasn’t. It was selfishness. It was carelessness. It was inconsideration and the longing for another child of God to sit at your feet.

I can’t lie. You had me. I was wrapped around your finger at one point. Meeting the bare-minimum, thinking it was okay to throw me away as long as I read a bible verse everyday. I fed so much into the products of your manipulation that I forgot about me. Me. The true essence of me. I wanted to make you happy. I felt like I had to make you happy. Truth is, it was never about me. It was always about you. But that’s okay, I’m no longer wrapped around your finger and contemplating sitting at your feet. I don’t adhere to your beck and call. I guess you can say, our little fling is over.

And guess what? I’m happy to say I broke up with the enemy.

Kenosis

Yesterday my mentor sent me a portion of Denzel Washington’s Commencement Address to The University of Pennsylvania. In this clip, he said something that made me think about my entire 22 years of life. He asked the question ” How many ghosts are going to be around your bed when your time comes?”. I know that sounds crazy, but the ghosts aren’t representational of those who have died. They’re the dreams, goals, and talents you never gave life to.

Think about your life. (I know we’re young and this seems far fetched, but we never know when our time is going to come.) How many goals have you executed? Are you making your dreams come true? How many times have you quit because it was too hard or you didn’t have the support? I can honestly say I have an entire list of dreams and goals that I quit on because of my inconsistency and procrastination. I was that person that needed encouragement from others to keep going and when I didn’t get it, I would quit. Do not be like me. Well not me. Her. Because I’m not the same person anymore. Don’t be like her.

I don’t want any of us to leave this earth still withholding what He’s given us. I always say my number one goal is to leave this earth empty, returning to Him bearing nothing. I want to use every single thing He’s given me no matter how long it takes or how tough the journey gets. I want the same thing for you. We’re on this trip together. Never forget that.

I love you all and never forget that you were created with a divine purpose that will ultimately lead to your destiny.